Did You Notice What That Sign Said?


It was not hard to figure out when my ex-wife had had enough of me.

My marriage didn’t end in a day and along the way there were signs posted. Nothing as well-marked as “STOP” and “YIELD,” though looking back, that would have been helpful. While not made in standardized shapes with reflective faces, the signs I received were equally as direct.

Before my days as a work-from-home, I was an early riser. Up at sunrise to open the stores, it was my ex-wife who generally made the bed in the morning. Coming home from work one day, I walked into our bedroom to see that she had only made her half of the bed.

A stop sign! Right there in the master bedroom!

Seeing your bed half-made is memorable. But that doesn’t mean you actually want to remember it! In my (12) post-divorce years, I had let that particular memory go. Lost to the passage of a decade and never to be thought of again.

Or so I thought.

Triggers

Dinner “en casa Lipton” is different without the kids. Buck is a vegan depending on the time of day, though rarely at mealtime. Chris loves to carb-load. Unless it’s “leg-day” in which case it’s carb-free. Guy will eat whatever you put in front of her. As long as what you put in front of her is what she told you she wants!

So when I took Guy’s favorite thin-cut pork chops from the freezer and left them on the counter to thaw, I wasn’t expecting any drama.

Later that day as I moseyed into my former office (aka, the kitchen) to get dinner going I came across the last of my roommates: my fiancée Gaetana, and the three glistening chops.

Beautifully seasoned!

Or, at least, one of them was!

WTF??