Where Italy Says Goodnight

There’s more you can do to affront an Italian than just speaking to them in English and ordering a cappuccino in the afternoon, though both of those would do the trick.

You can eat your spaghetti with a spoon or take too long to give way to a Beemer serpentining the Autostrade, either of which might garner a hand gesture from the offended native.  One you won’t need Tony Soprano to translate.

But breach protocol for food and you risk more than a side eye or hand gesture from an Italian protecting their culture from boorish invaders. As a server in a Bologna salumeria felt obligated to do after hearing my sandwich order replying, “We don’t eat it that way” through pursed lips and furrowed brow.

In defense of his rudeness sandwich making in Bologna is both art and science allowing salumerias in that city to use the word laboratory in their names; making scientists out of waiters and science deniers out of everyone else.  His judgment rendered though he allowed my experiment, never asking if I enjoyed my meal.

Likely certain I could not have.    

But the food in Italy is worth the insolence from the mortadella at the bottom of the food chain to the ragù Bologna is famous for at the top. Each bite of a quality unfamiliar to most Americans.    

Grown locally and served in-season Italian produce is noticeably fresher and tastier than American varieties.  Like their produce Italian meats, cheeses, oils and other food products are all subjected to strict regulation which allows for minimal processing.

Even when making mortadella.

And that quality is a privilege every Italian can access with most purchasing their foods from specialty purveyors in markets located conveniently throughout every city, rather than from big box supermarkets where most Americans purchase their groceries. That specialization and shorter supply chain saves Italian consumers as much as 40% as compared to Americans.

And of a quality which leaves dogs in Italy eating better than we do here.

In June I blogged about conditions I encountered in American cities my work took me to that winter;  I followed up that blog with a podcast further detailing that experience.  In those works I contrasted the failing infrastructures, homelessness and violent crime I encountered in American cities with my observations of their European counterparts I had visited, all of which set a far higher standard.     

My travels last week further amplified that dissonance.    

For three days in Bologna we abandoned the car experiencing the city of 800,000 mostly on foot, using public transportation to wonder farther afield.  Despite its size Bologna allows for easy passage with ample sidewalks (and porticos) and well-marked crosswalks where pedestrians have the right of way, explaining why Bologna had zero pedestrians deaths in 2024.

A significant upgrade over the situation here in Stamford.

Our hotel was adjacent to the centro storico, a livable museum of the Middle Ages in the center of a modern city which served as home base for our adventure.  Selected for its proximity to the Bologna food scene and its most captivating feature: Piazza Maggiore. 

Where Italy meets to say goodnight. 

Passing a paint store I convinced my fiancéeic to work as translator to allow me to question the owner. Who kicked us out for asking too many questions, gesturing towards the door as he bid arrivederci. Not the same gesture you might see on the highway, but using a tone reminiscent of the waiter. 

Grateful and also crestfallen we returned and I got right back to work with a Monday morning channel check from a finance bro pondering the state of Paint’s affairs. And the affairs of Sherwin-Williams leaving most to ask what I might know about that company beyond what I have published here?

And what it all means.

In the month since CEO Heidi Petz suspended Sherwin’s 401(k) matching THE bros have added a new line of questioning, focused on whether Petz remains viable in her position or if her poor judgement and ethical failings has cost her grip on the reins? 

And there are reasons they’re all asking.